Wednesday, October 31, 2007

If you must, and I must

Go immediately and queue Murder Party on your Netflix. It is truly hilarious and craftedly low budget. It did really well at a bunch of film fests and it's great. Lab of Madness is a group a la Broken Lizard but with a lot less money. We're working on getting some of their shorts. "You took a vow of silence. No, I took a vow of violence." It's just great. The movie feels similar to Art School Confidential which is another awesome movie but they're different enough. You can appreciate them both! 2 thumbs up definitely.

Salt soup, aka split pea with ham, was terrible. I apologize. I got my ipod shuffle in (thank you credit card points) and even though we're horribly behind the times and carelessly old fashioned, Hubs just got his ipod classic, we had a great dance party which led me to over salt the soup during Bombs Over Baghdad (thank YOU Outkast). So it was ruined. But I was really more about having wine for dinner anyway. It was one of those kind of nights. I come home, shuffles is there waiting for me, Hubs charges it and loads it with our wedding play list (which yes, we played Bombs Over Baghdad at our wedding and rocked it, thank you very much) and despite soup, it was great.

Hot Ham and Swiss paninis for dinner tonight. Sweep the roof so it doesn't catch on fire when we light a fire, prune mums, carve a jack o' lantern, turn on the porch light and give trick o' treaters lots of chocolate they don't need! Huzzah! Sounds like my kind of night.

kachina

sweet! new york in december is on! I love the city at Christmastime.

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

hilarious baby passing wind

Well that was fun while it lasted.

Found out very good close friends are prego and that makes me v. happy for them! Hooray! It'll be a beautiful baby however it turns out.

I can't believe it but I am already buying Christmas presents for people. Really shocked myself there. Shiza starts happening earlier and earlier every year.

Tennis for an hour and a half last night was a blast. Hoping we can work some in before boo at the zoo tonight. I need to verify people are coming bc if not, tennis and then ham and split pea soup. Yummy!

Ready to light our first fire. It's just not quite cold enough yet. Snuggling suffices and makes me smile.

I'm enjoying seeing people's Halloween costumes. Fairly funny. I've got pretty cool friends.

Monday, October 29, 2007

a heaven so clear, an earth so calm

Upon some advice (that I think is grand), here's my list of come what may, but you don't have the balls, otherwise known as, getting a few things off my chest that I'm tired of hearing:

Write that 1st novel, write anything for that matter, and get it published. I know it's not easy but it could also be that you're not that good a writer. I have Michael Chabon's email if you need confirmation.

Move to Thailand and live like "The Beach." Please. Really?

Be a model in Paris. Nonono.

Be a National Geographic photographer. I swear if I hear another average Joe say this I will scream.

Shoot music videos (this is my own).

Quit caffeine. You can't and even if you could, I don't really care. I act like I do, but I don't.

Be a forensic scientist like those guys on CSI.

The government is tapping our phones, they are poisoning us with flouride in the drinking water, they are zapping our brains with subliminal messages through Google Earth, yes of course they are. I know George W. is stupid and evil. Thanks.

Having more than 3 children is wrong because of overpopulation. I understand, and don't necessarily agree, but you said it before. I heard you the first time. I hear you everytime.

Welfare is bad. For all the same reasons as above because you don't like your job in the public system. Quit your job and move into the private sector, please. We all pay taxes whether you like it or not. You could move or vote. Those things help too I hear. And not just voting for President, although that's a huge stride. I'll admit.

Make fun of Republicans. (me) They are people too (but only partially).

Own your own racism. (seemingly everyone I know including me right now). I still laugh from overhearing an angry woman yell "You're just a damn mulatto" because it was funny. No, it's not right to be racist. But we all are to a degree be it skin color, homophobia, religious preference, etc. Cope.

Sarah Silverman is funny at times but she's not that groundbreaking. Unless a girl saying dirty things is groundbreaking?

Tell me you don't understand why Muslims hate us. Or why Christians are so evil. Just say fundamentalists next time please. It riles me a little less.

Being poor is romantic. No, it's awful. And hard. And unfair to your family.

I like donating to charity. It makes me feel better for hating to volunteer. I'm okay with this. Please stop telling me I'm wasting my money because of A, B, or C.

this has been a long time coming and it feels nice. By you I of course mean me. A hearty thanks to lameliar for my inspiration.

Friday, October 26, 2007

Not David Bowie

So last night was a blast in new lipsticks and David Bowie and A+ Setup in the bathroom. Some of them turned out so deliciously cheesy I couldn't help but put them up. In all cases I finally have some recent pictures of myself in case anyone forgot what I looked like, ha! cause you care, you really do.

I highly suggest it no matter. It was lossa fun!

This day won't end. I need the weekend.

Thursday, October 25, 2007

the keys to the kingdom are lost somewhere in the kingdom

Yesterday proved a challenge. I came out on top although sadly there were casualties. Letters that are all gone away, blue and red trimmed envelopes of memory, I miss you. But there's one left I found that I never opened and I never will and as long as I have that one, memories stay put where they belong.

All of this moving forward is really starting to take a toll on me. And I'm foolish enough to think it wouldn't. It wouldn't have been that big a deal. I keep thinking I find the starting point, where it all started, my progress, but I can't. Because I keep going back trying to find it. Lord, give me strength to move forward and quit going back. I can do it, I know I can.

I learned an interesting tidbit today. Celtic monks wandered Europe until they found the place that was calling to them; this was termed "seeking their place of resurrection." Isn't that fascinating and it may all be because I'm reading up so much on monastic life right now but can you imagine. Traveling your whole life just to find the place where you belong to die. And yes, proselytizing along the way but that not even being the point? And here all this time I thought that was the point. Sometimes I'm amazed that I understand anything at all.

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

there’s nothing like us

Have "Wake Up Alone" by Amy Winehouse stuck in my head and it's making me kinda sad but I can't think of another song and the phone's ringing too much to actually listen to music right now so ah.

But it's a great great song. And she's a good good singer and she arranged all the music on the album. Crack ho or no, I'm pretty impressed. Anne is going to be her for Halloween. In the ways I'm glad we'll be out of town and hanging with children, I'll miss Halloween. Chris and I always have the best costumes.

Reconnecting is weird how it makes me happy.

Hanging with children is going to be weird seeing as how it's all I can do to convince myself that is NOT my bio clock ticking. It's getting harder and harder. I'm too scared and too young, I tell myself. But all I want to do is love everything I tell myself. It won't be as glam as all that I tell myself. Unconditional love? I tell myself.

hmmm...malaise...nice.

So apparently The Hills is fake. Duh. Get over it. Internet gossip is letting me down today. And the sun. It was sunny for about 5. Ugh. I guess again no tennis.

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

out here among us

Holding down the fort solo today did not leave me any time for finishing The Name of the Rose. That's ok, I'll have curling up time in the heat-turned-on house with Bubs for that. He's reading Hell's Angels. I can't wait. Stupid monk murder and mayhem holding me up. It's so snowy looking outside and the cold rain hasn't stopped since yesterday. eek! I lurve it! Too bad Hubs out white wate rafting for work in this. Yech.

Completely jaloux lately hearing that Andy and Misha are heading to Japan. Seems like it's the most popular place lately, my mom, Chrissy, Mandy, now them. It's incredibly chic right now, the far east. I'd like to go for the Louis Vuitton and Marc Jacobs more than anything, maybe a Yohji Yamamoto hat, the cloud hat from the '00 collection. I used to have dreams about that hat. I used to dream about hats. I still dream about purses.

God sometimes I really miss working in fashion. But I won't be fucking poor and it's not worth the constant heartache. I do miss the annual trips to New York and Las Vegas though. When we get Chris's vacation all lined up after Mexico in July!! (woo hoo!) then we're going to take another trip to NYC, possibly as a pit stop for Paris. We'd like to think that's our next major destination, or Prague. Life loves Praha. I feel in love with a boy in Praha once. Had him convinced I was 22 and working on my master's in la litterature francaise en moderne and that Anne and I were definitely, definitely headed to Spain after Prague. But we weren't; we went and had the most fun at a Phish show in a little hippie village outside of Copenhagen, Denmark.

I have alot of mixed feelings about our time in Europe but that time, that was a good good time.

And in this time, it's time to go home.

Monday, October 22, 2007

wickedness is a myth

What a long weekend. I am going to be so ready to get some exercise and not do shiza this week (except that it's raining all week, boo!) and then go to the farm this weekend and see my baby girl cousins!

It's been wonderful coming back to LR, the reception is great, social season is on, but it's exhausting. I just want to plug in to some Sean Lennon and chill out. That last album of his, it's so good. It's really amazing. And the story behind it is wow. Really true. really sad. Perfect pop.

Anyway been watching some movies still. The Way We Were. One of the most perfect movies of all time. Robert Redford is THE most handsome man on the planet and he's perfect as Hubbel. See ya Hubbel. OH I just die everytime I see that movie. And it's perfect in it's 60-ness depicting the 40s. Babs as Katie, she's so fiery willed and confused. And her hair! OMG her hair! I'm taking a pic of her back in New York days to the salon tomorrow. See what we can work up. It's the kind of movie, well, I had a Hubbel, I know quite a few girls that did and we could all be Katie. And it makes me feel good to know Katie makes it out alive. And anyway it's slightly sentimental.

And then we watched An American Haunting which was good in an old fashioned ghost story kind of way and scary in a creaky house kind of way but other than that not really scary. And then Saw 3 which wasn't scary at all or really that gruesome compared to the others but maybe that's a good thing.

We were going to play tennis tonight after work but I bet it's going to rain and that sucks! I was really wanting to get out there and play.

Friday, October 19, 2007

count on your freedom

A little Tourrette's: Doesn't feel so good now does it? I think Fate is now I think Fate is now eating your shit humble pie. I'd take a slice off your hands because I'm a nice girl, help you out, but I'm already full. Sometimes it's hard to forgive. Sorry I just needed to get that out.

The fair/rodeo combo was a blast last night. I would like to give a standing ovation to the rodeo clown Evil Knevil times, Edwin and Christin Hankins, the Xtreme Swing hand of Death, hard liquor at the rodeo, no horses breaking legs during barrel races, and Bud light. I now feel like big poopy but in a good good way. At least I get off work early and the bulk of the month's work is behind me.

And it's a beautiful day. May go spend lunch taking a nap in the sun. Husband has boys weekend this weekend. No time even for a nice sendoff before Andy gets to town. There's always Sunday for when he gets back.

I wrote a gouly piece appropriate for Fall. If I remember I'll put it up. Something about pine limb curled pincers.

Thursday, October 18, 2007

always good for a storm

Like a chollo. Front to front side to side.

huh?

I really need to get to work. It's hard this morning though. The water tastes funny. I'm not highly motivated today. Hmm..

Jake, Imissyouyoustinkinghippyconvert.

I hope it doesn't rain at the rodeo tonight. Corndog city! but no fried coke for me.

Yeah I'm fairly out of it.

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

le mot juste

mot, funny typed. funny.

watched another great movie last night since Adult Swim didn't record except Frisky Dingo (God I love those Sea Quest guys)--

The Squid and the Whale.

Okay so it wasn't as dramatic as all that but it was wholly good. Pretentious characters but the writing wasn't. Extremely solid story line. Interesting but normal. Chris and I thoroughly enjoyed it. It was a nice way to start our Halloween scary movie-a-thon. 28 weeks later and Saw 3, here we come!!

In no less than an average miracle, my hair has grown back longer than it was pre-haircut in just 4 weeks. The blonde looks a little washed but more natural even. My brother really liked it which surprised me. Chris really likes it which surprised me. I get it did and a massage in exactly 1 week. For Anne's mom's party and Franke's sister's wedding I am thinking of bunning it up, Art Deco style, and wearing a long gown and very very dangerously high heels.

I wear flats so much at work that I need some danger and we don't really go out anymore except to sit on porches (which I LUV by the way) and so heels don't really go. It's high time I swapped purses too. Something more fall. I'm thinking the cherry Murakami bowling bag. I'm summer'd out. Time to turn in the sandles and jeans for a little bit more glam.

Monday, October 15, 2007

because I had the time

Let me try this again Internet Explorer, damn you!

A Door in the Floor was great. I'm not usually a fan of John Irving books so much as the movies made from them. Cider House Rules was another one I really liked. And how could you not, Michael Caine you ether snorting rascal you.

Jeff Bridges is wonderful as the eccentric artist. And who wouldn't love the line, "The door in the floor, it's a vagina." You have to love such a vagina oriented movie. But to say that's the center would be missing alot.

We got our Vegas Christmas spectaular vacation booked. Staying at the quint. Ceasar's Palace (we just can't really afford the Wynn, Red Rock is too far away, and Hard Rock just sucks), seeing Love (will be my 2nd time, it's sooo good) and Penn and Teller (ahh! my crush comes back alive!), visiting out in the desert some, take a little peyote a la Tony Soprano, who knows what could happen. I have to make a couple of dinner reservations, I think, and then we're just counting down the days. Christmas weekend in Las Vegas with my baby will be the best Christmas/1st year anniversary present ever!! I can't wait to go shopping!

Thursday, October 11, 2007

hip displaysia

Mother do you think they'll try and break my balls?

ha that Pink Floyd line is singing through my head over and over and making my giggle. Day has been long. Glad it's almost over. This last 30 minute home stretch is golden. And then get a little jump on with the Hubs and on the road to end finally finally our chapter of Fayetteville. And all is as it should be. Thank you Jebus.

Dinner last night was wonderful. I think my brother and I are truly at that place where we want to really actually be friends. It's such a strange thing to hear of how people relate to their siblings, have relationships. I've never really known how and I don't blame myself one bit for it but it's just strange when people know at any given moment mostly what their brothers and sisters are doing. And to think, for really the first time last night I felt like a sister. For the first time. Stranger in a strange land for sure. It was just so natural last night.

Sometimes I really wonder what my other 2 brothers are doing. Where they are. They didn't mean anything by it, I know. They were too young, too freshly married to take on a almost 6 year old sister as a child. Like a child. But then I look at these big families. All the age gaps and differences and it really hurts, why that couldn't have been us. me.

It terrifies Chris to think on it, but that's why I always have and still want lots of kids. Surround myself in love like a warn blanket of thankfulness.

I forgive my brothers what they couldn't possibly understand but I can never give them the opportunity to know me again. Holding on to that confusion about my place as long as I have makes it what I have left of that part of my family. I could never give that up, or worse, give it back to them. Because then I'd be holding nothing and my life thus far would turn into thin air.

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Have a nice day

I'm a blonde now Pt 2. Mostly. Working on becoming blonder. I really love it. It makes me feel good n' pampered.

Bubs paid and downloaded new Radiohead. Working on that.

Dinner with my brother and his fiancee tonight! I am making Pork loin roasted in Herbs de Provence with garlic, carrots, and onions and then my specialty brussel sprouts. Man you never had brussel sprouts so good. Iced tea and croissants and then grilled peaches and vanilla bean ice cream for dessert. I am very excited. I love to cook.

We close on selling our house in Fayetteville FINALLY on Friday. We go up Thursday after work and install a door and then we eat brunch, close, come home, play shuffleboard hopefully!

Then 2nd Saturday sale with Anne and her mom. I can't wait to see if we can get any giant stone Buddhas for our Zen themed garden in the backyard that I'm working on. I have my eye on a few fountains to die for but they really need to go on sale. I'm figuring they will soon with Fall coming and Winter. It's not really the time people install that kind of thing.

And then the Clinton museum and Flying Fish for lunch! I love date days with my Hubs! Then he has to work a booth at the fair Sunday so we're all going to support and ride rides and look at baby animals and eat fair food. I have good friends that they would go with me so I don't have to be alone while Chris slings Farm Bureau info.

First, get over this cough and head cold. I'm ready to get on my bike again without wheezing and coughing up snot. There I said it. Gross.

Thursday, October 4, 2007

We’ll roll that black Mariah through the streets of Spanish Harlem

I've been to Spanish Harlem and there's nothing that romantic about it anymore.

Sick: missed Wilco

Sick: missed !!!

Luckily I have seen both enough times that it's ok. It just would've been neat to see them in my home town.

Allergy/virus blast is amazing! I feel like poo then I feel great then I feel dizzy then I break out into a sweat and feel great! Go figure.

Figuring out tailgating is giving me a headache. I think we'll just show up and roll with it.

Tired again. Need more rest and puppy times.

Tuesday, October 2, 2007

sleazy tuesdays

leaving at 330! leaving at 330!

gumbo: brilliant.

company and scenario: not so brilliant.

searching for long lost high school alum on the internet: brilliant!

feeling like a stalker: not so brilliant.

really enjoying finding out about people: brilliant

actually having to make contact: not so brilliant

feeling like I have no choice!: brilliant!

spelling brilliant: not so brilliant

I still don't know if it's truly appropriate to have a reunion after only 10 years. I mean, personally, the last 10 years have been mostly years I want to forget, not sit around and reminisce about. Only exception to the rule is sitting with folks, who technically should be strangers, I mean we all haven't spoken in 9 years or more, and that makes people strangers again, and finding out that we've all, in ways more or less, wasted our lives in the past and are only, slowly as a whole, coming back and glueing the pieces back together to make ourselves more respectable and real.

Real dumb.

Monday, October 1, 2007

1st of the month

I still have my Bone Thugs in Harmony tape from high school that I stole from David Heister. Boo ya!

1st of the month at work is supposed to be tuff. We'll see.

Wes and Tasha over for homemade roux gumbo tonight. It smelled really good last night! We'll see!

2 hydrangeas, 5 azealeas, 1 Cleopatra camilla, about a million tulip, daffodil, and hyacinth bulbs planted and ranuculous. So done for Fall.