Feel like my soul has turned into steele

Things I think are weird lately:

(In a good way), when Hurricane Ike blew through town, this hideous thing finally got knocked down. Big ole pine tree just fell right through it. Was the talk of church. Someone said "God's will be done."

My bag of baby carrots melted. I always, daily, eat an apple and some baby carrots. Got to get that fiber, those vitamins, etc. Every day. It's a really good thing that I like carrots and apples so dang much. I mean really. Every day. But it's good for you. And I like the way health feels so. But anyway I bought my bag of carrots yesterday and put them in the fridge. Moved them this morning into the work fridge. Pulled them our for a snack and they were melted! Melted. Like there is a puddle of orange carrot juice in the bottom of the bag. So weird. Do I still eat them? Do I toss them? I mean the rest look okay but I in no way will touch the ones on the bottom. Too gross. Too melty.

I don't understand men and mustaches. I mean they just generally don't work. Really unless you're post 50s years old. Husband has a beard 999% of the time (bc I won't let him shave it for fear of not recognizing him and thus being forced to accidentally cheat on my Husband). But when any motorcycle festival or Halloween comes around he magically becomes TUT, the mustache guy. He shaves everything off except this dramatic handle bar mustache. It's a riot. I'll bring a picture later. The cyclists love it. They really think it's real. Tut, not unlike Burt Reynolds, is a force to be reckoned with. But now suddenly an old friend Stewart is sporting a 'stache. We told him, again, Burt Reynolds was calling. He only smirked at the joke. It's like I could understand if we were still in the phase of ironic trucker hats of the early 2000s but again. Move on. It's terrible!

Why people still think it's crazy to think a mom of 5 under 18 year old children won't have a hard time being VP. I'm sorry. aren't half her children still nursing or something? Sexist? Hardly. Truthiness. Exactly! (Have you signed up for phone banking for your candidate yet? Get off your butt! The time is nigh!)

This just blows my mind...FREAK! Criss Angel is so nasty! And that beard. AHHH NASTY! We get it! You're mind is freaky! You're beard is freaky! You date women with freaky large boobies! We get it! Stop it! STOP NOW!

THIS


Or

THIS


Jeez I feel like my head is going to explode. And what's with the handcuff jewelry? Is it because he's a magician? Is it like a Harry Houdini tribute or something? There's just something also very weird about men who wear too much jewelry a la Criss Angel. Now don't get me wrong, I have crushed on some hotties in the jewelry dept. but come on. I don't even wear that much jewelry. And I wear A LOT of jewelry.

T. Boone Pickens. Who is this guy?!?! (The cultural reference is the best.)