You're a shining star, no matter who you are

First of all, I miss you.

Secondly, last night was such fun. Despite feeling like big poopy, it was so great seeing everyone getting ready for our reunion. The committee is all friends that I was closer to in high school than now, or vice versa, but we're all a fun bunch. I really hope we can continue to get together or at least run into each other. It makes me think I'm glad I'm getting involved with youth home. Because that's what I really need! More to do! haha.

Anyway the final planning was lots of fun.

Thirdly, I'm about done with the Xanax. Lord knows I don't abuse it. I sure easily could because the sleep is divine. And I've been needing it lately with all this pain and no sleep waking up at 3am hurting. But my dream last night really just crossed the line. In ways that makes even me uncomfortable talking about it. The format was pretty funny though. I was a G.I. Joe fighting Cobra command. And I had a hostage. And then it got freaky. And, well, dreams are just that. But, it's like, you know. I used to get sick like this all the time in college bc of the holding on, and I didn't care about myself really. Now I really do though. I understand the need for slowing my life down when I don't feel well. Letting myself heal. Sometimes I still feel the need to apologize for that behavior then. This dream pushed me there.

Also my yogi dude's next challenge is pushing me there. Get this: Can you accept abundance? That's our most recent challenge. I'm still trying to read auras and shit. I think this sickness is part of the letting go. Accepting my abundance.

Lastly, we'll see.